Cut the Crap

We intentionally hired a Queer photographer for our wedding, and made sure they knew we didn’t want any traditional gendered shots.

And then our photographer got sick.

They called in a sub to save the day, who took awesome photos but who did not receive the “no gender norms” briefing. At the reception I felt pushed and prodded into poses I did not want, like the now infamous (in our household) suggestion that I sit on Jake’s lap for one shot.
I did not plan to cut the cake; I did not care about cutting the cake. Until, that is, the photographer bullied us into this standard pose and I realized I DID NOT WANT TO CUT THE CAKE. So we ended up with this photo.

I love this because it shows so clearly how I feel when I am not being authentic. I am not present in the moment, I’m not at peace in my own body, there is tension in my relationships.
One second after this photo I walked away and didn’t do another posed shot for the whole night.

I wish this authenticity and honesty for you, in your ceremonies and celebrations: to know you have the option to take up what serves you and leave behind what doesn’t. To make deep and gorgeous meaning that is honest for you. To let truth shine out of even the smallest moments.
All this is to say, I’d love to do your wedding and give these gifts to you.

Special thanks to Sarah who made these incredible cakes, with which I happily took many photos; it was not about the cakes, the cakes were perfect.

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